How to Avoid Spending Too Much Time With Your Boyfriend - Part 2
4. Guarantee that he has guy time
His friends may not be as open about it, but they probably miss him too. Guy nights are great for his social life and for yours! Tulane student and HC Campus Correspondent Catherine Combs and her boyfriend "set a rule that [they do] at least one night out or one day with [their] friends and not each other." While he's playing poker with his group, you can finish up homework or go out with your girlfriends. Spending time apart is just as important as spending time together.
5. Be up front with him
Chances are, you're not the only one slacking on responsibilities in this relationship. Talking about this time misplacement with your boyfriend is important, says Levine. "College is a wonderful time to meet new people and have experiences. You both would be missing out if you spent your time exclusively with each other," she adds. Make it clear how important your work is to you and he'll respect that (and if not, you know he's not worth dating!). If you're hoping to have a sleepover but know you'll be more inclined to go out to breakfast than to class after you wake up, stress to him the importance of your attending class. Talk to your boyfriend about practicing self-control with your relationship and decide together when you should spend time apart or with each other.
6. Already guilty?
For those girls who have already damaged the connection between them and their girlfriends, Levine suggests an honest apology. "Their friends know they dumped them and there's no getting around it," she notes. Admitting that you were wrong but are ready to make an effort is the best way to start fresh. "If they are really good friends they'll understand and be forgiving," Levine encourages.
Whether you decide to mimic those eventful Sex and the City brunches with your crew or entitle your boyfriend as a new study buddy, a new relationship doesn't mean that other friends and activities have to fall to the wayside. One of the many traits your boyfriend probably admires about you is your dedication to your friends and your passion for your extracurriculars, and these are most likely qualities you admire in yourself. It's important not to lose yourself in your relationship and spending too much together can do just that.
*Name changed to avoid offending a certain friend
Sources:
Irene S. Levine, PhD, Author, Best Friends Forever: Surviving A Break-Up With Your Best Friend
